March 26, 2011

Happy birthday Tumour

Dear Tumour,

I'm not exactly sure how old you are turning today, I know I am turning 29.

Some doctors say you must be at least 5 years old, because that is how long polyps take to turn into cancers. Other doctors say that polyps don't take anywhere near that long to turn into cancer in young people like me.

One year before you were found I had open surgery to remove my appendix, you must have still been hiding in the mucosa of my sigmoid colon then, otherwise you would have been spotted.

It has been a big year for us.

You breached my sigmoid wall, attached yourself to my rectum and are now waiting at the tissue boundary of my seminal vesicle and bladder.

I published some articles, discussed science on the radio, appeared on Chinese TV and a magazine cover, grew my company and visited The Philippines, Morroco, Malta, London, Madrid and Seoul.

What you achieved had more impact though because I didn't totally challenge anyone's world view, or threaten their life.

I've come to like you and everything, but I hope this is the last birthday message you get.

Ben Bravery

I was going to make you a cake in the shape of a colon but then decided to just get you some extra radiation


  1. Oh my that is an awesome cake! And very appropriate present for your tumour. Happy Birthday Bud!

  2. You've come to like him, I don't.(Haha I like you more .) I like your idea to give him some extra radiation instead of cake. And tell him firmly that 'this is the last birthday message you get'!.

    Happy Birthday Ben Ben !!!

  3. Hope that cake tastes better than the elephant one I made you years back! See ya tumor, happy Birthday bb! xx

  4. Happy birthday giant!What a cute message for the tumor!

    Hey,Tumor, you should shrink more in return for papa's birthday message.

    Xiao dou